Jack Meets Dennis    [ Season 1 | Episode: 6 ]

Search:
Character: Scene:
( 274 Quotes Found )

* Quotes are grouped by Scene
 
Together Again

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
It’s so sweet of you to walk me to work today.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
You’re my girl right? I take care of you, huh? Who knows, maybe we’ll see Natalie Morales, you know? That little firecracker, she gets me blood running south of the border.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
That is less sweet.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
I'm gonna stop by tonight. Maybe I’ll pick up some Chinese.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Aw, you said Chinese instead of something offensive.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
I told you, losing you last year changed me, huh? It made me more, um... more mature. Come here.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Ow. That really hurts! Dennis!
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
You’re back with Dennis?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Yeah, I'm back with Dennis. Don’t look at me with your eyebrows all up, it’s so annoying.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Oh, yes, I’m annoying. Not the man who honked your boobs on the Jumbo Screen.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
That was before, and it was the playoffs.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Does he still work at that beeper store? What is it, Beeper King?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
He is the king now, the old Beeper King retired. Well, technically he shot himself. But Dennis took over, and now he’s the only beeper salesman left in Manhattan. Which is cool. You’re doing the eyebrow thing again.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Because it’s Dennis. Who are you trying to fool? This is me.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Exactly. You don’t get to give dating advice. You sent a letter to Scott Pederson.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
After he dyed his hair and got super thin from all the stress. Are you kidding me? He was smokin’.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Dennis is a good guy, ok.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Not really. So when did this happen?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Well last week was my birthday, and everyone forgot except Dennis, He called, and we went out, and it wasn’t too weird.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
And how was the sex?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Fast and only on Saturdays. It’s perfect.

Libel!

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
Did you see this?! It’s horrible! They’re printing libel about me again. Libel, Liz Lemon!
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Ugh! “Normal” How dare they?
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
That’s what I’m saying. That’s character assassination. That’s not normal. It only looks like I’m walking out of a Starbucks, when actually I’m doing the robot going backwards into a Starbucks. And I don’t even know who’s dog that is! Yes. I steal dogs.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
What is the problem?
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
I can't be normal. If I'm normal, I'm boring. If i'm boring, I'm not a movie star. If I'm not a movie star, then I'm poor. And poor people can't afford to pay back the $75,000 in cash they owe Quincy Jones.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Wow. Talking to that guy is like looking in a mirror, huh?

She's 29

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Well, my armpit rash is back. Oh my god, Jack. What are you doing in wardrobe?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
The latest research is in. Our audience doesn’t like green.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Oh that’s too bad. I like green.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Research doesn’t lie Jenna, it lets us know what we’re thinking. What’s too boring, what’s too gay, what’s too old.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
What’s too old?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
That’s a very good question, how old are you?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
I’m 29.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
What year were you born?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
1977
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
What year did you graduate high school?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
’94.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
When do you turn 40?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
2017
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Junior high crush?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Kirk Cameron.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Prom theme?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Motownphilly, Boys 2 Men.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
What movie did you loose your virginity at?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Arachnophobia.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Theater or drive-in?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
What’s a drive in?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Of course. I don't know why I bothered to ask. I can tell just from your physical appearance that your obviosly... 29.

Josh Loves Liz Taylor

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
So, these page numbers, when done correctly, should be sequential.
   Cerie:
Rate This Quote
Oh. Oh, Josh, Liz Taylor's assistant called. They wanted the address here to send you something.
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
That's awesome! She must have seen my impression of her.
   Frank:
Rate This Quote
Sounds like someone loves Liz Taylor.
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
I do.
   Toofer:
Rate This Quote
No, we mean love love.
   Frank:
Rate This Quote
Yeah, like if she walked in right now, and said she wanted to do it with you, you would?
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
I definitely would.
   Frank:
Rate This Quote
What?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Liz?
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
I'm totally serious. I mean, wouldn't you guys?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Uh, Jack asked me how old I am.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
What did you say?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
29
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
(Laughs) (Clears Throat) Jenna, relax.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
I cannot and will not relax, Liz. I am an actress, and when someone asks an actress how old she is. It’s more statement than question.
   Cerie:
Rate This Quote
When my mom’s feeling old, she goes to this guy on 71st street. But she’s old. She’s like 38.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
I’m gonna be sick.

Livin' Like A Hobo

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Betcha he reads, betcha she sews, Betcha they've made me a closet of clothes. God.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Lemon, what tragedy happened in your life that you insist upon punishing yourself with all this... mediocrity?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
What, 'cause I’m eating a turkey sub?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Your turkey sub, your clothes, the fact that a women of your resources and position lives like some boxcar hobo, or maybe it’s the fact that while I’m saying all this, you have a piece of lettuce stuck in your hair. This is the unlisted number of Stone, the most exclusive restaurant in the city, currently. I think it’s time that you start enjoying some of the finer things in life.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Completely unsolicited and inappropriate. I will only accept it because I love food.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Do you know why Jack Welch is the greatest leader since the pharaohs? Because he didn't only involve himself in our work lives, but our personal lifes as well. He introduced us to the finest booze, the most restrctive country clubs. He gave us the names of the most discrete private investigators to spy on our ex-wives. He held our hands during our triumphs, and our senate hearings. I want to hold your hand, Lemon.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Yikes.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
This is a perfect example. You have a million dollar view, but you refuse to acknowledge that there’s a whole word out there. Oh my! There appears to be a gentleman making passionate anguine love to himself.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Yeah, I know that’s why I closed the blinds in the first place.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Right in his office. Huh. Lemon, I like to think of myself as a winner, and I like to surround myself with winners. I see potential in you. Let me be your Jack Welch. Let me be your mentor.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No, thank you.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
That is unfortunate. You've, uh, got to admire his persistence and stamina, though. Am I wrong, or is he in the middle of a staff meeting?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Maybe you should be his mentor.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Obviosly he doesn't need one. He's got it all figured out.

Restaurant Meeting

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
I got one for you. See the old guy over there, with the girl? Mistress or daughter?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Oh my god I hope it’s his daughter.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Yeah me too.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
(couple kisses) Oh my god I hope it’s his mistress.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Oh, that is just wrong. Hey 007, how about some more rolls over here, huh?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Oh, my, my. What a pleasant surprise. Lemon. And you brought a man. Jack Donaghy. And this is my friend. Anastasia.
   Lady:
Rate This Quote
How are you?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Hi. Dennis Duffy, Beeper King.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
The Beeper King. Really?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Uh, Dennis has his own business. Yes, he's an entrepreneur. He's very successful.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
You probably see my ads on the 7 train, right?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
I didn't know they served chicken nuggets at this restaurant.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
It's cod. It's, uh -- They made it special. Dennis has some dietary restrictions.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Actually, I'm allergic to all fish. Unless it's fried, you know?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
That’s a sharp tie you’ve got there Dennis.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
That douchebag up front made me wear it.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Does he know you’re the Beeper King?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
I don’t think so.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Anyway, thanks for the hookup. This is clearly the nicest restaurant we’ve ever been to.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Oh. Hold on a second, this place ain’t that nice, all right? It’s got rats and roaches like every other restaurant.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No rat talk tonight, okay.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
You know there are 17 rats per person in Manhattan. You eat a pound of rat crap every year without even knowing it, huh?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
I think I read about that in The New Yorker. Um, anyway, we’ll leave you to your meal. I hope you enjoy the, uh, choices that you’ve made.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Stop it.

Normal Young Man

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Kenneth:
Rate This Quote
And that former call girl went on to become one of NBC’s biggest news anchors.
   Kenneth:
Rate This Quote
Star coming. Wall hug, everybody.
   Lady:
Rate This Quote
That's Tracy Jordan! He seems like such a nice, normal young man.
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
Aah!
   Kenneth:
Rate This Quote
Let's keep going, you guys. Let's keep going.

Elevator Talk

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I enjoyed the restarant. Thank you. Just say it. Just say what you're dying to say. Dennis is nice to me okay? He fixed my toilet. He broke it first, but he fixed it. And he loves hockey, and I’m... figuring it out. And it's easy. I get a lot of work done. I don't have time for a personal life, okay? I can't just go to central park and join the singles' touch football league. Like I'd want to, anyway. People on those posters always laughing in their sweaters. God, who are they fooling? Oh, okay, you not gonna say anything to me because I rejected you as a mentor? Who cares? I have a lot of friends I can talk to about my life. The bottom line is, Dennis is my boyfriend because he inquired. He was the only applicant. And I am not... ...doing great.

The Fetus Look

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Come in.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Hey, do you have a minute? I need to talk to you about -- Aah! What did you do to yourself?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Me? Oh, nothing. Just getting more rest. Drinking more water.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Really? this water -- does someone boil it first and throw it in your face?
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Okay, I had a little botox, and some collagen, and a chemical peel and something with shark DNA. Admit it, I look 10 years younger.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No, younger even. You look like a fetus.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I came here to talk to you about my problems with Dennis.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Oh, I can't right now, honey. If I don't do my facial exercises, I could wind up looking weird.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I just mentioned Dennis, and your eyebrows didn't go up.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
They didn't?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
How about now?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Unh-unh.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Anything?

The Beeper King

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Hey, what's up, baby? Liz around?
   Cerie:
Rate This Quote
Is that a present for her?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Yeah, and if she doesn’t get back soon, I’m poking air holes in it. Excuse me, I couldn’t help but notice, that uh, none of you are wearing beepers.
   Frank:
Rate This Quote
You sell beepers?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
I sell a way of life my friend.
   Frank:
Rate This Quote
Cool. I could use some ironic accessories.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
What are you doing here?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Hey. I brought you a present. Uh-oh. It got out. If anyone sees a salamander, it’s Liz’s.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No, I don't want a salamander, and I don't want you here selling beepers.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Why not? I mean, you work in a business. Businesspeople need beepers.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No, they need cellphones.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Oh, yeah, for now. But the beeper's gonna be making a comeback. Technology's cyclical.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No, technology is not cyclical.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
I thought I recognized that voice. Dennis, how the heck are you? Did you enjoy that restaurant?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
No, I think I was right about that place. We saw a whole nest of rats when we were leaving.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No, we didn’t.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Yeah, I did. I didn’t tell you 'cause I knew you’d freak out. Actually, I think I saw a rat king.
   Frank:
Rate This Quote
Aren’t rat kings a myth?
   Cerie:
Rate This Quote
What’s a rat king?
   Frank:
Rate This Quote
Oh, it’s when a bunch of rats are crammed into a tiny space and their tails get all tangled up and they can’t even pull apart.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
And then it gets awesome. Eventually, their bodies fuse together and they form a multi-headed live rat king and we saw one.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Gosh, I hope you got a picture of that with a camera on your beeper.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Actually, my beeper doesn’t have a camera. But it does have a pedometer. Actually, not this one.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
I love him.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Listen, I need to talk to you in my office, please.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Why?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Now.
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
What's up?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Is that a tattoo?
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
Uh-huh. Who normal now? You hear me, America? Who's normal now?

Face Tattoo

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
How could you do this to the show?
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
I got this tattoo for the good of the show. It give us an edge. The reason why you brought me on. And when you purchase Tracy Jordan, he comes with a tattoo of a biblical dragon from outer space.
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
It's gonna take forever to cover this with makeup.
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
You can’t put makeup on my tattoo Liz Lemon, it’s in my contract.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No it’s not!
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
Actually, he’s got a pretty weird contract.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Great, Jenna looks like a porn-star burn victim and now this idiot. What are we going to do?
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
It’s going to be Josh’s busiest show ever.

Ms. Taylor

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz Taylor:
Rate This Quote
Josh.
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
Ms. Taylor. When your office said you were sending me something, I didn't realize it would be you.
   Liz Taylor:
Rate This Quote
But I had to give you this gift... in person, Josh.
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
Oh. I'm just glad you weren't offended by my impression.
   Liz Taylor:
Rate This Quote
Oh. But I was. Deeply. I’m here to give you the gift of pain.
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
The gift of what?
   Liz Taylor:
Rate This Quote
White Diamonds! Aah!

Jack's Handiwork

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Okay, very funny. You bought a pager from Dennis. Will you take it off now, please?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Oh, I can’t. I’m expecting a call from 1983.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Look, Dennis takes care of me, okay?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Liz, I'd like you to meet Howard Jorgensen.
   Jorgensen:
Rate This Quote
Liz, how do you do?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
He's the vice president of locomotives and a rising star at G.E. I thought the two of you had a lot in common.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
You are relentless. Look, Howard, you're obviosly an attractive and confident guy. And at a diffrent time in my life, I could definitely see the two of us together.
   Jorgensen:
Rate This Quote
I'm married with two beautiful kids and a pool.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Liz, I wasn’t trying to set you up. I wanted to show you my handiwork. I used to mentor Howard.
   Jorgensen:
Rate This Quote
I was a lot like you. I dressed poorly, had bad posture, walked around with lettuce in my hair.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Oh, Son of a bitch.
   Jorgensen:
Rate This Quote
And I cursed like a sailor. But Jack saw potential in me. He changed my life.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Now Howard's earning seven figures, and he's married to a swell Filipino gal.
   Jorgensen:
Rate This Quote
Thanks, Jack.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Look, I told you, I don't need a mentor.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Fine.

Judging Choices

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
Liz Taylor really messed him up. He might have brain damage.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Oh my god. Maybe the musical guest can do some extra songs this week, who is it?
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
James Blunt.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Mm. No, I said no lettuce.
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
Are you at that crappy sandwich place again?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Why is everyone judging all my choices lately? This place is fine. It’s convenient. It’s consistent. I know what I'm getting. It doesn’t make me feel bad about my body. And maybe I’m at an age where it’s ok for me to settle for this.
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
Are we still talking about the sandwich place?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No sadly, I don't think we are.

The Rat King Revealed

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Okay. I admit it. Dennis isn’t a sandwich I want to eat everyday for the rest of my life. I’m clueless about men. I’m clueless about everything that isn’t this show. Maybe you can tell me how to live, because sadly you may be the most stable person I know right now.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Gentlemen, we’ll have to continue this conference call some other time.
   Jorgensen:
Rate This Quote
That's her again, isn't it?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Hi, Howard.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Lemon, today is the first day of the rest of your life. And what is the first thing you need to do?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I have to break up with Dennis.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
And why is that?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Because he wears shirts with the Looney Tunes embroidered on them. Because he cuts his own hair. Because that one little nice thing that he does, doesn’t make up for the fact that I don’t want to be seen with him in public.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
And if you don’t break up with him now?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
He’ll just keep showing up at work to sell beepers. He’ll just keep calling up my mother to borrow money. We’ll just get more and more tangled up in each other’s lives until I just can’t even get away and we’re just like -- Oh, my God.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
That’s right. He’s the Rat King. And there’s only one way to break up with a rat, you have to cut him off completely.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I know.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
You have to stuff your heart with steel wool and tin foil. You must be ruthless, you must be absolute. Remember always you are the exterminator, say it.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I am the exterminator.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Say it like you mean it.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I am the exterminator!
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Louder!
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
I am the exterminator!
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Okay, not that loud. People are trying to work around here, okay?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Okay.

Tattoo Revealed

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   P.A.:
Rate This Quote
30 minutes to dress rehearsal, everybody.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Tracy, they need you in wardrobe.
   P.A.:
Rate This Quote
That's 30 minutes to dress.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Why is part of your face still on the pillow?
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
Damnit. Where’s my Sharpie?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Oh, It is fake.
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
Look, I’m crazy, not stupid. A movie star can’t have a big old permanent face tattoo. I just need to walk around with this for a week, get my picture on the interweb, show the world I’m still dangerous
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
What about next week, when you don’t have it anymore? You’re going to look like --
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
I had extreme plastic surgery to have it removed. Baboom! There's another "not normal."
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
You know this is very, very, very bad for me, right?
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
I need to protect my reputation. You take away my street cred, and I am Wayne Brady.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Nuh-uh. Wayne Brady has three Emmys. You have a People’s Choice Award that you stole from Wayne Brady.
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
I shouldn’t expect a white woman from Whiteville to understand street cred.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
First of all I’m not from Whiteville. I’m from Whitehaven. And it’s not as nice as it sounds. Ugh. Fine. You can keep the tattoo. For this week only!

Well, We Had A Good Run

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Man:
Rate This Quote
Okay. Here we go. Quiet please! Rehearsing.
   P.A.:
Rate This Quote
And now a word from the White House.
   Jenna:
Rate This Quote
Good evening. I'm Laura Bush.
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
And I'm Condoleezza Rice.
   Josh:
Rate This Quote
(Mumbling)
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
Well, we had a good run.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
What the hell happened here?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
The cast had a rough week.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
These people cannot be on television. What is your contingency plan for a crap storm of this magnitude?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
There is none.
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
We go live in a half an hour.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
No wonder you career is being held back by a lack of foresight, and an addiction to dysfunctional relationships. You have no exit strategies?
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
He knows about my marriage?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No. This is gonna be a bad show.
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
Worse then the time we let Tracy do that tribute to August Wilson?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Worse then the time we did that Gilbert and Sullivan parody.
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
Maybe we’ll be preempted by some national news event. It's still hurricane season, right?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Oh! A blackout. That will work.
   Pete:
Rate This Quote
All right, nobody panic. The backup generator will kick in in just a few seconds... Okay. You can panic.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
This is real
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
We dodged a bullet here tonight, Lemon.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Yes, this blackout is a fortunate coincidence. You didn’t do it right?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
What you think I control the universe?
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
Yo! This blackout messed me up. I didn't get to debut my dragon face. Can I do "The Today Show" tomorrow?
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
No, You’re on a plane to Boston tomorrow, Tray, we have a laboratory they're experimenting in tattoo removal. It promises to be one of our biggest profit centers once today’s generation finally sobers up.
   Tracy:
Rate This Quote
Tattoo’s fake Donaghy. Fake.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Street cred. He’s a genius.
   Man:
Rate This Quote
Flashlight, $20. Flashlight, $20.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Can I give you a ride?
   Man:
Rate This Quote
Flashlight, $20.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
No. I wouldn't want to crowd you.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Be strong, Lemon. Don't let Dennis chew his way out of this one.
   Man:
Rate This Quote
Flashlight, $20.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Can I borrow 20 bucks?
   Man:
Rate This Quote
Flashlight, $20.

Confronting The King

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Dennis, wake up. God.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
Huh? What?
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
You're gonna burn the place down.
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
I wish I had burned the place down. There’s no reason to live anymore.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
What happened?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
The Islanders lost tonight.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
Doesn’t that happen a lot?
   Dennis:
Rate This Quote
I knew you wouldn’t understand.

He Moved In

Share Quotes Facebook | Twitter   Rate your favorite quote
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
So, how did it go.
   Liz:
Rate This Quote
He moved in with me.
   Jack:
Rate This Quote
Well, of course he did. (Liz's Pager beeps)