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Hank Hooper:
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Good morning! So how did Co-Worker Pitch Day go, Jack?
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Jack:
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Well, EMPLOYEE Pitch Day was of course a new experience for me.
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Hank Hooper:
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Oh, speaking of new experiences, I ate at an Indian restaurant last night. I had naan!
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Jack:
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Sir, I- I- I mean Hank. I appreciate you have your way of doing things, but so do I. I am a Six Sigma Black Belt Ultra with the groin branding to prove it.
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Hank Hooper:
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What's... Six Sigma? Rock band?
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Jack:
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I'd like to start this meeting by sharing one of my own ideas. And after you hear it maybe we can agree that Employee Pitch Day is time that could be better spent drinking and and, uh, looking out the window.
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Hank Hooper:
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Okay Jack. You're putting it on the line. What have you got?
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Jack:
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Hank, what's the one part of the television experience that's not perfect? To me it's the remote control. Too easy to lose, right?
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Hank Hooper:
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Yes! I lose my remote all the time! Grr, couch cushions. [laughs]
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Jack:
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What if you didn't need a remote control because your remote control was your own voice. Television on. [TV turns on] Channel NBC. [TV changed to NBC]
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Detective Oldafin Tutuola:
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[on TV] Crew out of the Brox called the Ace Dueces.
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Hank Hooper:
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Jack:
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I give you "Voice Activation."
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Detective Oldafin Tutuola:
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[on TV] Word from my CI's he got off by- [TV turns off]
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Jack:
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That shouldn't happen. TV on! [TV turns on] Uh, "Voice Activation" or "VoAct"-
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Sgt. John Munch:
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[on TV] The only lead we have is some mute kid- [TV mutes]
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Jack:
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Detective Oldafin Tutuola:
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[on TV] My friends at the DEA say these guys have a high volume of cocaine coming in from the docks. [TV turns the volume way up]
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Jack:
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Sgt. John Munch:
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[on TV] First I want to go home and delete everything that's on my DVR. [TV reads "DELETING ALL..."]
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Jack:
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Detective Oldafin Tutuola:
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[on TV] Now why would you do that? Aren't you six episodes behind on Top Chef?
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Jack:
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Hank Hooper:
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Jack. It doesn't seem to work. You got any other notions or should we jump to employee ideas.
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Jack:
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No, no. No. I have another idea. What if, um... What if... you had a black bar at the bottom of the screen that prevented you from seeing anything dirty.
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Hank Hooper:
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I like that. I like that a lot. It would allow parents to eliminate racy content like soccer or a woman stuffing a turkey. That's a real family company kind of idea, Jack, and we could sell ads in the black bar. Increase our revenue stream!
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Jack:
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You could call it... "Blah Bar."
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Hank Hooper:
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A plus work, Jack. [hugs Jack] I don't need to hear anything else if that's the kind of ideas you're bringing. Nine, ten. [stops hugging] You will go far, son. Yeah! [leaves]
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Jack:
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Crap. [TV switches to "Keeping Up With The Kardashians"]
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